Posted on by August

All PRINCIPLES from “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie

I think that “How to Win Friends and Influence People” is definitely one of the most important books I’ve ever read in my life. At its core, it’s a book about how to be the best person you can be in terms of social interactions.

Considering how crucial this book is to any human being, I’ve decided to write this blog post dedicated to just the main lessons from it. I do recommend that after you read this (in case you haven’t already) you go read the whole book – it’s a interesting and relatively easy read.

Without further ado, let’s get into it!

Part 1: FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE

  1. Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
  2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
  3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.

Part 2: SIX WAYS TO MAKE PEOPLE LIKE YOU

  1. Become genuinely interested in people.
  2. Smile.
  3. Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in the world.
  4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
  5. Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
  6. Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely.

Part 3: HOW TO WIN PEOPLE TO YOUR WAY OF THINKING

  1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
  2. Show respect for the other person’s opinion. Never say, “You’re wrong.”
  3. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
  4. Begin in a friendly way.
  5. Get the other person saying ‘yes, yes’ immediately.
  6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
  7. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
  8. Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.
  9. Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
  10. Appeal to the nobler motives.
  11. Dramatize your ideas.
  12. Throw down a challenge.

Part 4: BE A LEADER: HOW TO CHANGE PEOPLE WITHOUT GIVING OFFENCE OR AROUSING RESENTMENT

  1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
  2. Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
  3. Talk bout your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
  4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
  5. Let the other person save face.
  6. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be ‘heavy in your approbation and lavish in your praise’.
  7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
  8. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
  9. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.

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